Self-love

Do you love yourself?  

That’s an easy question isn’t it? Of course, you love yourself; after all you are you right?

Actually, it is not that easy. Especially when you live in a society where you are constantly compared, judged, labeled and graded; it is difficult to accept yourself and consider that you are enough. Self-love is actually making yourself believe that you are valuable and worthy.  Loving yourself does not only help you get most out of your life but also helps you maintain satisfying relationships. Thus, here are some ways to have a better relationship with the most important person in your life, yourself.

People (espically youngsters) often compare themselves with airbrushed models and try to be more or less like them. So, the first thing you should do is to stop comparing yourself with others, accept your flaws and be grateful for what you are. Would you like to hear your lover criticize you every now and then? No, right? How can you criticize yourself when you cannot accept that form others? Learn to embrace yourself and believe that you are perfect just the way you are. That will eventually make you more confident and you will start caring less about what people think about you. 

Letting go of negative feelings and forgiving yourself for your mistakes is another way to improve relationship with yourself. We all have done things that we are not happy about; we all have made numerous mistakes in our lives. Instead of closing yourself out of grief, disappointments and fears of future ridicule; admit your feelings and put them behind you. Cherish what you have learned form challenges and how you have grown form them; and most importantly, forgive yourself.  

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Spending more time with yourself is one of the most crucial parts of radical self love. As, it will help you understand your feelings better and be comfortable with who you are. So, close your laptop, take off your headphones, turn off your phone and just hang out with yourself. Go for a walk or a trip, theater all on your own. As you start doing it more often you will come to know how essential this time is for building up your sense of self and you will grow to love and relish it.

Moreover, being around constructive people and feeding yourself with positive things helps you become a better person. Don’t be around people who criticize you and make you feel bad. Misery loves company, so do not always hang-around with unhappy, frowning and grouchy people. Talking to negative people eventually drains your own energy. Feeding yourself with positive things do not include foods only, it is also includes TV shows, music and what you do online. Even though occasionally  treating yourself with your favorite junk food will not do much harm, remember to take your of your body. Similarly, watch productive TV shows or sows that make you feel better.

Once you have accepted who you are completely, start putting efforts   to be a better version. Read a book that you have always procrastinated reading or take a trip that you had always dreamed of. Learn something new every day and try to be more positive and productive. Doing yoga and meditating can also help you connect with your inner self. Similarly, visiting museums, meeting new people and working on things you are passionate about also helps you connect to your authentic self.  Involving in social work, donating, helping others also make you feel more contented.

Celebrate your personal triumphs, both big and small. Since, it is easy to become distracted by potential achievements and neglect past accomplishment it is important to remind yourself what you have achieved. Moreover, always remember your competition is with no one but your former self. Winning and losing is a part of every game, the vital thing is to be better that what you were before.

Being selfish is bad, but being selfless is worst. Sacrificing sometimes may be fine but when you constantly put yourself second, you set up an inevitable pattern of behavior. Do not always accept invitations to places you don’t enjoy being, do not do things just because someone else wants you to do it. Do what you love to do, engage in your own interests and most importantly, learn to say no. Sometimes you might be in situations where you will not be able to decide what to do, in that case just ask yourself, “What would someone who loves themselves do?”

Having a great relationship with you does not happen right away, it is going to take a lot of time and commitment. Every day, do something nourish you body, mind and soul. And, Love yourself enough to take actions required for you happiness.

AtmaVarta